Now this blog is nothing if not completely and utterly pointless. You wont find a single, solitary soul among the army of messianically dedicated jowl spotters, jiggle statisticians and jaw yaw engineers in my employ who is prepared to contest that assertion. But given that it IS entirely without purpose, direction or agenda, we may happily deduce that it is NOT nothing (stop me if I’m getting too technical). And if it is not nothing, then it must be something. And something, it is. Many things, in fact. Millions of billions of them.
One of them things is TOPICAL. This here blog throbs with the pulse of public opinion. It sits right on the cutting, slicing, blood-spattered edge of current affairs and has the seeping gluteal lacerations to prove it.
All of which maundering gibberish is to introduce a pretty lazy drawing of Liam Fox who I gather has been in the news recently for illegally harbouring something called a “Werrity” on business trips. Now my understanding is foggy at best but from what I can glean, a Werrity is some sort of overgrown pigletty creature and by sticking one in a suit and giving it business cards and junk, Fox contravened a litany of municipal animal ordinances.
The less retarded among you may observe that this drawing doesn’t look much like Liam Fox. You might be inclined to point out that it doesn’t look much like a fox either. And finally, you may venture to suggest that by pre-empting these observations, I am seeking to sweep the rug of truth and conviction from beneath the feet of my would-be critics before they have even had the chance to curl their toes into the shag. You’re probably thinking that this as a craven display of what my therapist would call “safety seeking behaviour” which could have been neatly avoided by simply drawing a better picture. Now you’re probably thinking that it would have been even better avoided if I didn’t bother drawing anything and mercifully forbore from inflicting my nonsense opinions on the world….
These observations are germane and prudent ones which you are to be commended on making. And in response, I will say this: shut up.
Anyway, Foxy has some pretty handsome jowls and I for one will miss watching them swing majestically back and forth like massive grey hams in a butcher’s window. It is a loss to which this country will not easily adjust.